The Spiritual Process

Suffering. It will be today's subject. A hot topic. These words that I'm going to say about suffering are for the seeker of Truth only. If you're not a seeker of Truth there will be no point in trying to use these words because it will not work. You will understand why I'm saying this. Suffering is the great addiction. It is an addiction. If the seeker of Truth doesn't treat this as an addiction he will not be able to break its bounds. Suffering is at the basis of human life, at the core of human life. What you think you are at this moment, this body-mind complex is based on suffering. Suffering is a part of your identity. For you, in a way, suffering is suffering. It has no connection with circumstances. But as you look for happiness in circumstances or you seem to be looking for happiness in circumstances so it is with suffering. This individual has learned to get his suffering from certain circumstances. He has the need, the deep need to recreate these circumstances so that he can guarantee his suffering.

Yes, it seems strange because what it seems is that everybody is looking for happiness. So now I'm telling you that you're looking for suffering. But if you see, you'll see that when things are very good there is a certain suspicion about things, somewhere deep down. But when things are bad, when you're in suffering there's a "ha-ha" to that. It's like the cycle has closed in the way as it should. And it's like this. As it should. Because these are your real expectations about life. So, it's a matter of survival, a matter of feeling safe that things go to the same point every time. For the majority of you human life is a quest for suffering. It is suffering-based. This is not a problem, but I'll speak about this later. It is suffering-based. It seems that you're really going after happiness, but it isn't, you see? The big mother of suffering is hope. Yes. And they say hope is the last one to die. And this gives this hope that eventually it dies. When it dies, this is when freedom from suffering can become a possibility. Not an end in itself, it isn't. It's only for breaking the ties that bond you to this, to illusion, to nature, to existence. It seems that it's an universal life that presents itself full of opportunities, that you're going towards happiness, but it isn't. There's nothing new. It's quite mechanical (the human life). There's a constant motion to recreate those circumstances that bring you suffering. Suffering will be the last, the last thing to let go. These words are for the seeker of Truth or to the one who is trying to establish himself sincerely in the quest for Truth. What you're looking for is the most terrifying thing for you. Your survival instincts make sure that you guarantee your suffering because it's about the survival of identity, which is suffering-based.

If you don't know this, if you don't know that suffering is an addiction -- and it has to be treated this way -- you cannot escape from it. If all the suffering was removed from your life the same time it would become unbearable. For those of you who deal with other people, like therapists and all of this, you have seen that if you push someone with knowledge, understanding, and all the support you can give it for a time, you see it coming out from its suffering. And as you let go, "now you have your own feet to walk..." or eventually, even if you are still there you'll see it going back again to the same point or even worse. Sometimes it has to be worse, to compensate. The first impulse is to help, to take it again back to a place where it's not experiencing that suffering. But why the person went back again to that point of suffering? Because that is where she wants to be. She doesn't know that, but it is. It will be very difficult for you to relinquish your suffering, your sources of suffering. This is why behavior patterns and all of this are difficult to let go. Because at the end it guarantees suffering. This is feeding the apparent identity. The mistaken identity, this little you. It is suffering-based. For most of you, this seems nonsense. But for some of you that went through these thick layers, that have really pushed into yourselves trying to gain distance from all these impressions that arise, these pullings towards investments, you'll see: suffering is precious. I've seen many of you that come to me crying, completely desperate saying "I cannot stand this anymore". I look at you and I see, unfortunately: yes you can stand it much more. You need it much more.

To some I can speak, to the majority there's absolutely no point. Later I'll explain why there's no point. Wherever you go, if your focus is still in the worldly activities or if your focus is in spiritual activities, or in Freedom, and for example you go somewhere to a spiritual place, you dedicate yourself to this, you'll see that behind this comes always the person. It comes to a new environment, you start to recreate the same relationships you had. The persons you will meet you'll transform someone in the mother, another in the father, another into this, another into that. You'll recreate your own personal theater where you can experience these sufferings, different sufferings. And how come does this connect? Life is suffering-based. In the apparent beginning, as suffering is being experienced and this personality is arising, deep beliefs are ingrained, like lack of self-worth. I don't want to go too much into detail, because it would be a long conversation and change the direction of the subject. The beliefs that you carry about yourself, the deep beliefs need constant food because they don't have a value by themselves. With this suffering experience -- who comes first... well, OK -- these deep beliefs about yourself are the motor, the engine of your life. And they are suffering-based. You have seen this in relation to others. that sometimes you are saying one thing, making a comment or something with one intention and the other gets hurt intensely and fights back, reacts in an unexpected way, without any... it doesn't make sense. It doesn't because your intentions were different so the reaction seems to be without any sense. But your words have touched the other one in a particular way that has nothing to do with you. It's her own world. This is what she wants to see. She wants to see these words coming out of your mouth. She wants to interpret, she needs to interpret in this way. The wounds are there. So whatever you're saying, it's always about rejection, rejection, rejection. There's not much going around here. Rejection because you're not good enough. So criticizing is rejection. Everything comes back to the point where you're not good enough. This is what you really believe. You!! It's not about others. It's never about anyone else. What is, what does the one who has no value, who's not good enough? What does this one deserve apart from suffering? This is your deep belief -- one of the deepest -- and the motor of life.

You dream of happiness, of freedom from this suffering, but it is important as oxygen. When you put this into your head really and understand this principle that all your investments have been for suffering, it will make sense. And then you'll have a real chance to break these chains. A real chance. But it's very difficult. I'm not telling you this so that you lose your... It's for you to have a notion of that which lies ahead. Don't take this lightly. Suffering will be the last thing you will let go. It is the most precious one. Love, real Love, Happiness, Truth, Bliss, Wholeness -- not for you. This is the most scary, these things are quite scary. It's nice to pursue them to keep them far away. You'll see by looking at your images of happiness, the things you've been fighting for. You'll see, worldly or apparently spiritual... You're always pushing them further away. As you seem to be getting closer to having everything there that you believe will bring you happiness, you'll add a few more items to make it go a little bit away. You'll remember certain moments, not once, not twice, often when you got close to something you knew it would bring you happiness. You and your own childish expectations, of course, but whatever. And you got scared and diverted your path. It is scary. Suffering, by the other hand, is difficult, is hard, but is known. It is safe, in a very twisted way. It is precious. This need to get away from suffering, this is what keeps the cycle of human normal life. From desperation to hope, from hope to desperation. Desperation to hope, hope to desperation. This is how next time it will be better. What does this mean, better? These ideas that I carry about happiness, these images, these circumstances will be there and then I'll be happy. The first step to break the chains of suffering is to understand it is an addiction to very deep levels. It is about identity, it is about the preservation of your world, of your illusion. It doesn't matter whoever you're having a relationship. You'll transform that individual into a character to adapt to your play.

It's kind of crazy, very crazy. Very, very crazy!! You can only understand this and see these things in play when you have done a lot of work, inner work. When you have matured a little bit. If you had matured a little bit and you had the experience to be in the middle of other seekers of Truth, real seekers of Truth, you'll see this at play and both, you and the other one, will be working their own things instead of going to the other and trying to solve it outside. But still, with all this notion, with this vision, it will be very difficult. Not impossible, of course not. But difficult. So just running, riding towards the sunset without a notion of what is there makes no sense. What I call a worldly person? It's someone who's still maturing a lot of things, experiencing a lot of things. It's not a depreciation. In this stage, there's no point in speaking about this. Maybe he'll try to transform it into some kind of a therapy, but I'll go into this latter. And with it, it is of no use. If you still want things from this world, anything from this world, you'll continue to be compelled towards suffering. The happiness of this world is masked suffering. Circumstantial happiness is suffering, even if it is by the greatest facts of all. You don't know who you are. Only this... Only this -- or these, whatever -- is the root of all suffering. From where you can see now in circumstances and "why is this always happening to me?", and "why like this?" Because you need it to be like this. Without these cycles from hope and despair, suffering would not cause an impact. It's like a drug, you have to increase the dosage, or else... So it has to change, you see? You have to go to the deepest, to the deep down. You have to come to the highest point also. Because only after a big dosage of fun and entertainment and -- happiness is a big word, but OK -- human happiness then if suffering comes, and it will come, but only after this it can cause a big impact. People have a life of circumstantial suffering You see? Their lives are a nightmare in terms of life conditions and relationships. A lot of violence and abuse. Their sensitivity to suffering is much lower but they too are in an epic of suffering. You can see different individuals, and you'll see different sensibilities to suffering. According to this, you'll look at their epics and their stories. One has to break one leg, the other has to break a finger nail, for example for the same amount of intense pain. When you're in the upper part of the cycle, the happy cycle, the happy go-go, there's suspicion, suspicion inside, and "this will not last" or "something wrong will happen". It's not a suspicion, it's an expectation. But when you go to the deep of the well then there's a "ha-ha, I knew it!!" and with this, a relief. Observe. Without knowing this, there's no way you can break this dependence, this addiction. But if you're not a seeker of Truth, impossible. Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, you're just maturing to the point to get to this understanding because there's no worldly seeker or well-being seeker, there are just Truth seekers in different levels of understanding, whatever that means, also. Without suffering, your goals and your dreams are your hopes. Are your sufferings. If you don't go to these deep beliefs about yourself and see that all these investments trying to prove others that you're worthy, that you're good, that you're special... It's never about others. You're trying to show this to others so that others give you a feedback that can counter the beliefs you have about yourself. And it doesn't work. One million will say that you're special, one will say that you're nothing. This will be the one that will touch you. The others, you'll continue to be with suspicion.

This one will touch you because this one is giving the same opinion you have about yourself, that which you really believe in. All these (needs), the need to feel prettier, the need to be nice you're countering deep beliefs you have about yourself. "You have" is very strong, but it seems to be like this. Let's say that "are there", whatever that means. It has nothing to do with the world. Absolutely nothing. And all your investments, the majority of you you can say that you're working for yourself, you can say that you're working to improve the world, but it has nothing to do with this. It's about guaranteeing suffering. All these dreams of circumstances towards happiness, relationships, maternities, families, work, possessions and all of this, it's about the sadnesses that you carry, those deep beliefs that you have about yourself. These are like salvation. They are quite physiological in nature. Mechanical, completely mechanical. These dreams are guaranteeing your amount of suffering. This is how you're using this. With the spiritual knowledge about the spiritual laws, to an extent, by knowing these laws and living through these philosophies, these grossest sufferings tend to disappear but the deep core will remain. You'll continue to get this intensely. This knowledge of this way of living has created a persona, a spiritual persona, that has become more smooth towards the contact with others and has pushed this into the most intimate relations. Socially they're nice, but intimately... When things become intimate, it becomes intense and explodes. It doesn't matter how much you try, this is for seekers of Truth only. That means: the ones that want nothing else from this. He's not looking for God to improve his life. He's looking for God to become one with him. He's looking for the Source to dissolve in it, not to have a better dream. If you're addicted to the dream, you're addicted to suffering. There's no separation. The best dreams you have are suffering-based. They're based on the convictions you carry about yourself and the visions you have about the world. Nothing new, nothing fancy. Just this. Without knowing that it's an addiction, impossible. If you know, if you can see this, not just because it was said now, if you can look into yourself and see this, you'll start recognizing the patterns, the investments what they hold behind and why things happen the way they do.

Then it will be easier -- easier, not easy -- to stop these investments, to cut these investments because these beliefs here are very strong, about circumstantial happiness. This is how Maya makes you continue to be deluded and engaging, engaging in her story. Abstracting from suffering, from investing in circumstances that bring suffering it is intense. You'll see how everything will be fighting to push you back to your suffering sources. It will win a lot of battles, a lot of them. You'll conquer small ones first, then you'll lose. Then just a little bit... and you'll lose, lose, lose... But if you have focus and determination, you'll succeed. It's unavoidable. Unavoidable. If you ignore and just take these new ways of life and take spirituality as a way of improving human life you'll just be fooling yourself and continue the same way. For Mother Nature, for Maya makes no difference if you think you're smart or if you're dumb, as long as you're complying. In the end, you are your own joke. It's like this for all. She'll only release you when you have shown that you have what it takes. No point in pleading. It has a point, but not much, because you are Greatness. So why are you lowering like this? As you see yourself as something small, lowering is a need. The humble ones are picked up from the ground by the Divine and are taken to the highest spheres. The proud ones take the stick into their heads, their heads are put down into the ground so that they can gain life, gain this humbleness and be able to really go up, not to a castle of clouds of suffering. Look around, not to others but to what you call your life and your investments, and see for yourself. In the next video I'll speak about suffering as the releaser. OK.